Posts tagged ‘Kerry Wood’

Wow. If there was any question to how devoted to Chicago sports Derrick Rose is, the question has been answered. In all caps. And with misspellings. D-Rose put Kerry Wood’s hot tub injury to shame in one fell slice on Monday. It’s a shame that we can’t hear the trash talk that the lauded Bulls guard will hear starting later tonight.

Here are a few guesses at some of the on-court banter:

How bout’ dem apples!?! — opposing guard, after making a 3-point play after a weak foul by Aaron Gray

Hey Martha Stewart…(trails off) — Charles Barkley, en route to making a point about turnovers

Welcome to the Jungle of Fun. Please remove your shoes. — Judd Buechler

A knife! In the bed! What were you thinking! — Reggie Miller

‘Now it cuts like a knife…but it feels so right’ — jukebox at bowling alley

Can I get a witnesssss! — Rev. Jeremiah Wright

Can I get a witnesssss! — Larry Hughes

Who will I pretend to want to pass the ball to after dribbling 20 seconds off the shot clock? Heal up, son. In the meantime, did I say you guys could stop counting my money? Count it! Count it up! — Ben Gordon

Go Bulls, and Go Bizarre Injuries!